How I learned to stop worrying and came to love Brexit -with apologies to Stanley Kubrick

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“How I learned to stop worrying and love Brexit” – with apologies to Stanley Kubrick.

Full disclosure mode – I’m a remainer

For those who’s value in life or to society is measured by how full their inbox is, or by the ping of incoming emails, I can strongly recommend subscribing to the UK governments Brexit alerts system if you seek to top this measure of importance.
You will soon be deluged on an almost minute by minute basis with advice on converting your PDNs to PILs, “Guidelines on Paediatric Investigation Plans, waivers, deferrals and compliance checks” , what to do with your fish or horse imports (and exports) and the occasional modification of a statutory instrument or two, and not forgetting how grandfather might have a problem when swooping his CAP for MA.

One glorious afternoon this week HMG managed to splurge out 48 different emails at the same time. My inbox beeper running off a veritable symphony of pings and bongs as they flooded in.
Why you might be asking yourself, would anyone voluntarily wish to sign up to something so obviously constructed to turn what remaining mental capacity you had into a full-on Brexit brain freeze?

… And more so, why would a technician need to know this stuff?

Well, masochistic mental tendencies aside, there are some beautiful little gems of useful and applicable knowledge scattered within, that will help us keep the flow of important science bits and bobs flowing (almost) seamlessly into our teaching and research labs from our chums in Europe.
.. .And also moments of general enlightenment, when it seem like its time to buy an island and disappear for a year or two.

One such example was snuck into the afore mentioned deluge the other afternoon called “The Future of International Research Collaboration”- defiantly a subject that keeps my water craft buoyant.
It covers the speech given by Science Minister Chris Skidmore and the overall conclusion of his near 4000 word speech was “it will (probably) turn out right in the end.”
However no-one can get away with a nine word speech, least of all a minister.
So of course the best way to stretch a speech is to slap in lots of examples and references. Indeed there were many fine examples of how, across the decades, UK and European science has benefitted through joint collaborations, with a few £million here and the odd £billion there.
However aside from these worthy science references, some more interesting examples of our Europeanness were included. Ranging from the Beatles (who sang in Hamburg bars) and Freddie Mercury (who sang about a European capital) and of course not forgetting the slightly more cerebral musings of “Dichter und Denker’ and their influence on British political thinking. (This is probably all their fault)
… and apparently there was also this guy from Stratford who liked to write plays set in Italy and Denmark.

I’m not entirely sure where the minister’s tongue was whilst giving this speech, but I’m sure that during some of it, it was firmly ensconced in his buccal cavity.
So there are some moments of levity to be had amidst the blizzard of the Brexit info storm – albeit hard to find, and we can all rest easy in that we don’t need to worry about grandfather, his PILs or which way the horse or fish are facing, … well at least not yet).

And as I wrap-up, the dawn chorus of bings and bongs has just started, heralding the arrival of more top Brexit information to be digested or discarded.

M 10/10/19

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