{"id":13,"date":"2021-09-06T10:16:32","date_gmt":"2021-09-06T09:16:32","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/blogs.bath.ac.uk\/shew\/?p=13"},"modified":"2025-01-27T11:14:04","modified_gmt":"2025-01-27T11:14:04","slug":"lets-talk-about-being-childless-not-by-choice","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/blogs.bath.ac.uk\/shew\/2021\/09\/06\/lets-talk-about-being-childless-not-by-choice\/","title":{"rendered":"Let's talk about... being childless not by choice"},"content":{"rendered":"

Next week is World Childless Week<\/a>, this is a week that aims to raise awareness of those childless not by choice (CNBC). As with many events that are held around the year, they offer an opportunity to focus on a topic or issue where more awareness is required and the stigma around the subject challenged. It also presents the chance to highlight the support and community that can be accessed should you or someone you know need help to manage their unique situation.<\/p>\n

And it will be unique, every journey to this point will be different.<\/p>\n

The vast majority of people are childless by circumstance, not through choice and the stories shared by staff members<\/a> identify some of the complex reasons. Often people might think of childlessness in terms of people who \u2018do not want\u2019 or \u2018cannot have\u2019 children. Whilst childlessness can be due to medical reasons such as infertility, it is much more commonly due to circumstance.<\/p>\n

Research indicates that almost one in five women reach midlife without children and Jody Day, founder of Gateway Women online community, writes about fifty ways not to be a mother<\/a>. Robin Hadley identifies that research on men who are involuntarily childless<\/a> is less prominent.<\/p>\n

Coming to terms with being childless not by choice involves loss and grief. Jody Day explores the \u2018disenfranchised grief\u2019 or \u2018living loss\u2019 of childlessness. Because the grief is unseen it can cause a real struggle when it comes to putting on a brave face to carry on with life, which in turn can have a huge and long term impact on mental health and wellbeing. Disenfranchised grief, also known as hidden grief or sorrow refers to any grief that goes unacknowledged or unvalidated by social norms. This kind of grief is often minimised or not understood by others, which makes it particularly hard to process and work through.<\/p>\n

Colleagues affected may choose not to discuss childlessness in the workplace as sometimes life at work can feel like a \u2018safe zone\u2019 compared to time outside work where interactions with peers or family can feel overwhelming. However if you feel someone might like to talk consider these do\u2019s and don\u2019ts.<\/p>\n

Do:<\/p>\n