Welcoming a new year is a timely moment to pause and reflect: What did I learn last year? Where did I grow? What challenged me? It’s also a chance to set intentions, embrace new challenges, and focus on what matters most.
When I think about my own reflections and where I experienced moments of learning and growth, it brings me back to conversations that really mattered - the ones that provided me with space to reflect, to be challenged, to feel supported, to receive feedback, to be heard, and to be recognised. These conversations rarely feel easy because they require honesty, vulnerability, and courage.
At the Centre for Coaching & Leadership, we’ve been exploring what Generous Leadership looks like in action and what makes it difficult or challenging. A recurring theme in our leadership community is stepping into conversations that feel difficult, different, unavoidable, or unknown. These could range from wellbeing-focused conversations with someone struggling at work to addressing noticeable changes in performance. The response to the difficulty? Delay, or at worst, avoidance. The recurring reality? These conversations are important. They offer space to build understanding, clarity, trust, and expectations - they matter.
Susan Scott’s work on Fierce Conversations centres on the principle that the conversation isn’t about the relationship, it is the relationship. When we consider the conversations that matter in this way, we understand that every interaction has the potential to strengthen or weaken trust. In other words, avoidance has an impact on our relationships. What’s not said leaves matters open to interpretation, confusion, a lack of clarity and direction.
Ask yourself:
- What conversations have I been avoiding?
- What’s the impact of not having these conversations?
Being a generous leader is the opposite of avoidance - even when it feels hard, and the message is difficult to deliver. Generous leadership calls us to step into dialogue with care for the person, courage to speak openly, and curiosity to understand their perspective.
Pause and consider:
- What space needs to be created for these conversations?
- What specific habits can you build to create safe conditions for these conversations?
- How will you check-in on your approach and impact?
This year, think about how you’ll commit to the conversations that matter most – whether that means creating space, building habits, or reflecting on your impact.
To help you take the next step, here are a few resources worth exploring:
Training Workshop
Online Courses
Bite Size Online Courses (Development Toolkit)
- Giving Feedback
- Building trust with your team
Reading
- Scott, S. (2002). Fierce Conversations: Achieving Success at Work and in Life, One Conversation at a Time. Viking Press.
Responses
Thanks for this Lizzie, really interesting. We'll order the book for the Library so anyone else interested can borrow it