Thanks to the latest NAEE news round-up for alerting me to George Ellis (1753–1815). He was a specialist on medieval literature, but (in 1778) wrote The Twelve Months under the pseudonym Sir Gregory Gander. Here they are broken into seasons:
Snowy, Flowy, Blowy,
Showery, Flowery, Bowery,
Hoppy, Croppy, Droppy,
Breezy, Sneezy, Freezy.
Still pretty apt some will think. Meanwhile, here is Flanders and Swann's take on the whole miserable affair:
A Song Of The Weather
February's ice and sleet, Freeze the toes right off your feet.
Welcome, March, with wint'ry wind, Would thou weren't not so unkind.
April brings the sweet spring showers, On and on for hours and hours.
Farmers fear unkindly May, Frost by night and hail by day.
June just rains and never stops, Thirty days and spoils the crops.
In July the sun is hot, Is it shining? No it's not!
August, cold and dank and wet, Brings more rain than any yet.
Bleak September's mist and mud, Is enough to chill the blood.
Then October adds a gale, Wind and slush and rain and hail.
Dark November brings the fog, Should not do it to a dog.
Freezing wet December, then... Bloody January again!